Post Op

I looked outside today at the tree in front of my house, it was beautiful. That tree has been there my entire life and but today I saw it for the first time without my glasses. I watched the branches sway from the wind. I could actually see the leaves instead of patches of blurry green clouds. Fucking amazing...

So I just underwent cataract surgery for my right eye and I just took the eyepatch off.. haha I look hilarious with it on. My sedative juts wore off and I am feeling so fucked up. I wish I was Linda Blair from the Excorcist right now. I feel like I'm getting skull fucked by a demon's fiery cock. The procedure basically me staring at three lights and it felt like the Dr. was either filling my eyesocket with sand and salt or punching me over and over in the face...

I feel fucking fantastic right now... haha. Its kinda cool cause I cans see close with my left eye and now far with my right eye. My depth of field is all fucked up now, which is kinda cool cause everything is in focus.

Coffee and pie, oh my!

"Insomnia with a caffeine addiction? Now that defeats the purpose" - Eli, Insomnia Bites

Shit dude, I dont know why I'm still drinking coffee after all this time, its almost 4am. I just got back from a freakin Denny's where Seth and I were going over the once over for what I guess will be our film project to end all film projects: Our Last Days As Sailors...

We came up with that project last year and I finally convinced Seth that now it the time to do it. We need a big point in our win column and I truly believe that we can tackle a project of this magnitude... And this little tale about 4 men on an island is HUGE. I mean we're talking complex characters, beach locations, costumes and continuity, filming backwards (for the beards), fighting the weather, funding, and our biggest enemy to the very livelihood of our equipment: SAND!!!!! and lots of it.. I hate sand so much. If our camera drops once this project is donesville..

and we don't even have the script written yet. But we got this.. hopefully.

The greatest love story ever

Isn't considered a love story. Its called Return of The Living Dead 3. Seriously no joke, you'd have to watch it to believe me. Theres this young army brat that moves everywhere with his dad. He meets this girl and they want to run away together. But Dad will have none of it. (btw the dad is an army general experimenting with a chemical called Trioxin that reanimates dead corpses). So they decide to leave and they get into a motorcycle crash and the girl slams into a telephone pole. The kid then takes her body to the army base and reanimates her corpse. (if thats not love, then I don't know what love is)... jump ahead about 40 minutes, 10 dead bodies and an entire subplot with a schizophrenic homeless guy and 3 stereotypical mexican gangsters and we find our protagonist back at the army base, all hell breaking loose, military lockdown enforced and the son has to choose wether to go with his dad, who all of a sudden cares about his son and shows it by vomiting one of the cheesiest monologues ever. OR choosing to stay with his girlfriend who has become some kind of sexy BDSM zombie. In the end he gets bitten and him and the girlfriend choose to climb into an incinerator together. Fade out and credits as you see them holding each other as the flames get higher and higher.. what an image.... I cried.

do the math

I'm sitting in the studio right now burning discs for two of the shorts I had to do for the trabajo..

I need to burn 15 dvds..

This computer is suprisingly fast, but it takes about 7 minutes to burn one disc. and in between it takes about a minute to load another disc and get ready to burn, so lets say 8 minutes. times 15 discs equals 120 minutes. 2 HOURS!!!!!! and currently I'm burning my 3rd disc.. lame..

I'm talking to Vic on the internet right now. Yeah its via facebook, but I just say internet...

I guess I'm gonna go watch a cinema 10 presentation to kill some time.

if only for the sake of the weather

im right about to head to school to burn discs.. ohhh god kill me now.

I make music at night. I made this song which has to be the most singlehandedly devious song I've ever made. Its so cheesy its good.... those I told sad it was sad also, which I agree.

I had this conversation with my friend Kristine about being happy. I claimed that I dont think I really know what being happy is. There are things in the world that truly make me feel alive, like film, music, art and friends. But happy? How the fuck would I know? Haha.

but anyways 4 more days till surgery.

Look to Science

Sometimes, (like now for instance) I hate being in the office. I sit in here trying to work on things, but I end up just bulshitting the day away. Im end up scouring the internet for signs of a hopeful outlook on my current inquisitiveness.

"and all we have are our regrets/look to science, when god quits".

song lyrics, titles, and sample dialog always rush through my head and speeds that would make a cheetah look like a winded fat kids running after the ice cream man. I think I forget half of them by the time I write them down. The above phrase about god is a lyric that I eventually want to put into a song somewhere. Im not a very religious person but for some odd reason god is ever present in my songs. I'm not praising the shit out of the guy, in fact its quite the opposite. Maybe its all the As Cities Burn that I've been listening to.

Final cuts and finishing touches

Last day of class is on Wednesday. I have one more short to edit this weekend and then its off to burning discs. I think for a person that works with cameras a lot, I have ben pretty elusive cause i rarely appear on camera. I was editing and I saw myself walk into frame and for some reason I didn't recognize myself at first. I laughed.

i spent this morning trying to sleep but all I could think about was this coming week. I have so much to do, on top of that I have my right eye operation. 5 days left. I promised not to panic. I tell myself that its routine. I got this.

I feel like I keep making the same mistakes when it comes to that one thing.