rapture and raptors

I kinda wish they misspelled it and they really meant to say the Raptors are coming. The darker, cynical side of me is begging for the fucking world to end. There is no god damn point to this bullshit. But in all seriousness, I'm not even phased by this while thing. I find it extremely hilarious how people are acting. People are tripping balls, getting drunk and wasted. There is a tiny little hint of a speck of me that second guesses it tho. Like, really... What if something does happen? If so, it would make me sad that I'd be spending it alone. Then I get that mental kick in my brain that puts the hammer down on those silly notions.

Hmm. Its about 4:30 as I'm writing this. Honestly, I'm starting to question continuing this blog. I already wrote, and posted a blog once before stating that this would be my last entry. But like the flip of a coin my mind changed. I don't really have anything to write about... or better yet, I don't really have the motivation to write in it. Other than my work. I kinda feel like nothing really matters anymore. Thats how I'm going to try to live my life. I am a goddamn workaholic. I've always known that. I hate having nothing to do. I prefer textbooks over novels. I like working 12 hour days on film sets. My only goal right now is to get a job working on a primetime show for a major network either in Studio city or in Vancouver. I have a passion, and I guess a dream. I have goals and possibly a future. I'm not gonna be stuck in the bay area making bullshit films. I take my shit seriously.

I know I'm going to rant again about the serious lack of seriousness in the filmmakers in my immediate area. I feel so embarrassed for them. All I want to know is if they are serious about what they want to do. If not, then its whatever, I won't even think twice about them. But if they are... then what the hell. I don't believe that the filmmakers in this area should all get along and help each other out and help each other grow. I won't let anyone take an opportunity out of my hands for the sake of teamwork.

I'm adopting a serious no bullshit mantra. seriously, film is the only thing I'm good at, so I know what the fuck I'm talking about. I got hit with reality about quality. My friend Adam gave it to me straight about how our work kinda sucks. Then again, he helped write most of that shit. So keeping with the times. I'm discarding all my old equipment. Actors are no different. I'm only into doing good shit now. And I'm getting a lot of opportunities to work on more professional sets. I'm gaining valuable experience and I won't share one bit of it.

These are the things that spew from being awake at pretty much 5am. I'd write more but I really have to pee and then get back to editing. And I hate editing.

And to whoever reads my blog and has read this far... Thanks.

what the hell.....

So me and a few of my film colleagues are now the in house film crew for a company named Movizine. Their office is in downtown fairfield inside of an old bank. its getting renovated and I gotta say it looks pretty good. We still have to work out the kinks with the owner on exactly how much we're getting paid to do pretty much any video type work. but it looks like I can add another avenue to my revenue stream. Dude.. I just noticed.. I'm really starting to make bank.